Decided.

So i decided, i'm going to keep this blog...atleast to use for my own personal thoughts, feelings, etc. I don't think anyone really reads or follows this one so it makes it easier. I'm thinking i'll start another one which will be more for the "cool" stuff. We'll see...or maybe i'll just make this one "look" cool. haha!

hello...

...anyone out there?? I haven't blogged in ages but been getting that urge again. Thinking if i should re-start blogging here or start another one and start fresh. hmmmm...in the mean time, for your viewing pleasure:

Nothing Specific...

Well, it's been a while since I've written anything in here. It's not like I never have things to write about cause I do. I always have thoughts, events, randomness that I just want to put down and alot of times I'm actually writing the blog in my head, but by the time I get to the computer, i just don't have the urge to sign on and put it down on paper(or in this electronic filled world, computer screen). I think that's why I really like Twitter and why I post on there alot. Whenever I have a random thought or just something i want to put down, it's readily available. I should just do what Ceez's does and take all my "tweets" at the end of the day and copy them and make them one blog. Speaking of twitter, i'm really tired of people complaining when I see them that I "tweet" alot. Ummm, there's a simple fix: turn off your "text notifications" for me...OR, DON'T FOLLOW ME. Atleast I don't have "AIM CONVERSATIONS" on twitter. RANT OFF.

Dance. Another year of Bmod has come to an end and the End-of-the-Year Banquet is upon us. I'm very proud of my "kids." Even though I didn't actually compete with them this year and I wasn't always around at practice, I felt like I was with them all the way. I only missed one of their club performances, one school performance, and one at the dance studio's parking lot but for the most part, i was there. They have all come along way since we had deliberations for them to be on the team in fall and they've grown so much since then. They may have not placed but "dancing isn't just about winning and getting trophies and getting recognition...it's about demolishing everyone else!" haha! sorry, inside joke. But really, I'm proud of how far they have come as individual dancers and how far they have taken the team. I didn't tell any of them(but some will know after reading this blog) that at Ultimate Brawl(their last competition of the year) as they were performing, i thought back on the year and the first social and the first rehearsals and where they were at now and I don't know why, but the auditorium got really dusty and made my eyes water. Damn allergies. LOL. As for me, individually as a dancer, I'm not going to lie...I miss it so much. It was the one thing I had in my life where I could go and put the stress from everyday life on hold. Being away from it has made me realize how "sane" it kept me. I know I can't dance forever, but while I believe I can still do it, I will...even if it's just through workshops and classes. "Dance like no one's watching..." Oh one more thing...It's that time again:



Lakers . My beloved Lakers made it to the finals again. But they didn't do it without giving me alot of scares, headaches, stress, and nervousness. Haha! I hope they're ready for the Orlando Magic because they're going to be tough team to beat and this isn't going to be an easy series. I'm hella excited though. Can't wait...speaking of Lakers, these playoffs made me realize, I don't know what annoys me more...Laker haters or, arrogant Laker fans who act as if they were the ones who just played in the game or, Laker fans who are dumb BASKETBALL fans. I can't pick, they all annoy me equally. The Nike Lebron and Kobe puppets really crack me up(best Nike commercials since that other guy that wore the number "23"):



Cars. My cars have been given me alot of stress lately. From paying for insurance, registration, gas, smog, maintenance, or just to get them running right. I know I shouldn't complain because they get me from point A to point B but sometimes, UGGGHHHHHH!! The civic has been giving me the most stress. I failed smog last february because my timing was off but for the past few months, I couldn't figure out why it was off. I finally gave in and paid a friend to get it smogged "not so legally" Sorry Mother Earth but hey, my civic still runs cleaner than most cars out there. Then, on my way to a bbq last night, she decides to overheat. I think the radiator it busted. *sigh* i should start cracking on that now, but i'm still in lazy mood.



Love. FAIL. Neeext.



Brother. My brother graduated from SDSU a couple of weeks ago. I'm so damn proud of him. He went from barely graduating from high school to graduating "Magna Cum Laude" in college. He deserves it. He worked so hard in college. While the rest of us siblings all got involved with our various clubs and events, he buckled down and studied. Especially difficult when going to a party school like SDSU. All the friends he made were from his major or people who were focused on school. And he's coming out of college with the least amount of debt compared to us. Good job bro!



I guess that's a long enough blog. I should really get started on working on that car. One last thing, one of my cuter roommates:



Till next time...

Spending quality with her and I can't help but reflect how much I need her in my life. Her voice, her heartbeat has always been in the background, with every step, every journey and she's never left my side. I know I can always trust her, I know she won't let me down. She is a part of my life and that's where she will always be. I love her and she loves me...

When I'm sad, she lets me cry. If I need comforting, she soothes me. When I'm happy, she smiles with me. When I'm excited, she jumps for joy. She brings out the best in me, and sometimes, the worst. She can make me dance with all my heart, or make me sit around and do nothing...she makes every moment with her worthwhile...

She's been through so much herself. I've seen her change in so many ways since we first met, but she still knows how to touch my heart...how to move my soul...I've seen people take her to different places and different heights. I've seen her in all her glory and I've seen her at her worst. They've manipulated her in every way possible way, but it doesn't change the beauty i see in her. She's still the same to me...

I still long for how she use to be. I try to remember the first time her beauty crossed my thoughts...the first time her voice vibrated in my ears. In the end, as I have grown and changed in my own right, she will too. I will cherish how she was but I'm excited to see where she will go. I love her and all that she is...

As I continue my journey of life, i will hold her close and she will always be a part of it...

Music is life, music is soul.

Run for the Border

Last weekend was Bmod's annual Winter Retreat...unfortunately for me, I was sick so I was not able to join in the snowboarding, alcohol, and other shinigans that goes down at Winter Retreat. Instead I stayed home most of the weekend. It seems I was sick the whole month of Feb. Happy bday month to me indeed. I had two cases of the flu, a cold the rest of the time and a cough that didn't seem to want to go away. Yay! So instead of being out and about, I was inside and bored. But I was productive. I finally finished cleaning and rearranging my room. The turntables are set up(let's see if I actually start messing with them now)and I can walk around again without having to find places to step. However, spending Friday night and all of Saturday at home, was too much for me. So when Marco invited me to go on an SD run with Bert and Maja to get some Chamorro food, it was hard to resist. Armed with my roommate's Canon G10, we were off. (Side note: I think I've been bitten by the photography bug. Must invest in a nice camera).

It was a beautiful day for a drive. Most of the trip was spent listening to old school hip hop/r&b jams or listening to Maja and Marco play the "license plate game"



or making fun of the Bert because of the rainbow that followed him everywhere:



"you know how i know Bert is gay?"

Our first stop was, of course, Islander Grill to get some good ol' Chamorro food:





I get my usual: Combo#2 with BBQ Pork Ribs, Chicken Keleguen, and some Red Rice



After we were all done and satisfied from our meals, we decided to pay our friends at 5&A Dime a little visit. Before we left, Bert decided to leave his calling card:



who knows, maybe he'll get some gigs down there and we'll have more reason to come back and get some Chamorro food(San Diego is the only place in So. Cal to get Chamorro food unless you cook it yourself)

We headed to downtown San Diego and 5&A Dime:

















Chopped it up with the Gian of 5&A Dime. Seems like everyone is feeling the effects of the dipping economy. Sad times.

Said our "byes" to Gian and SD and set off for our trip home with a quick stop at Yogurtland. "Stay Classy San Diego..."

Irritation...

I haven't blogged in here in like forever...i need to get on track again. But right now I'm just too irritated. Sometimes I wonder, are some people just that blunt or that socially retarded? Are people really that oblivious to what they say?! All i can say is that I put my heart, sweat, tears and everything else into that same thing you call a "team" or maybe, even a "family." And for someone to make that kind of remark they did to not only me, but to someone else who put so much into that same thing, I honestly don't know how I walked away without throwing a nice fist to your face.

BTW...for people who always need to be the center of attention...GET OVER IT! The universe revolves around the sun...not you.

Sorry...rant off...

Lonely, but rich...haha!

So I came across this video on youtube:



It had me thinking. I haven't had a serious relationship in YEARS...I haven't really dated much either. There have been crushes here and there and a couple where I totally fell or was falling for the girl, but I always find myself getting stuck in the "just a friend" ladder. The, "I see you like a Kuya(older brother)" or the "I don't want to risk our friendship" situations. Yeah, it's probably my fault cause I like to get to know girls as friends first and I've never really been one to date a stranger. Anyway, back to my conclusion. I've come to the conclusion that if it's not in God's will that I do find someone, I pray that he atleast makes me rich. haha! Yeah, I probably sound greedy or have a face of money, but I really am not. I'm not greedy, but if I'm going to be lonely and have to suffer from that for the rest of my life, atleast let me be rich. Hahaha! It's better to be lonely and rich, than lonely and poor. Atleast if you're rich, you can do things that will, even momentarily, help you forget you're lonely. You can travel the world, meet new people(even in just a platonic manner) and do many things that will still make it feel like you lived an interesting, worthwhile life. Granted there may always be that void...but I guess it's just easier to deal with if you can afford to do things to help you forget about it. Yeah, I know there's people who have never gotten married or found someone to share their life with and never felt that loneliness and were perfectly fine. I know i'm not one of those people. haha! Heck, when I was 5 years old, I remember dreaming about having my own family. Who does that?! So if I'm meant to never find someone to share my life with, I'll be fine...just let me be rich please. =)

On another note: Bmod's recent performance at Avalon in Hollywood last Friday(Sept. 19, 2008)



Yeah, I messed up a couple of times and lost count. Oh well...OVER it. =P Time to get ready for the next performance...MAXT OUT!!